Thursday, June 23, 2011


Sup Bull Penners? Aight, so initially I was going to make this a co-host thing and co-write this with my homie Khaya. However, after reading what she wrote I thought to myself that I'd only water it down if I posted my words alongside hers. So with that said, please enjoy, comment, and respond to her post. Tomorrow I'll post my words and thoughts on the subject, (possibly) along with a question. -Eno-

It was a quiet evening in downtown NYC- warm, but not sticky, and right after the hustle and bustle of rush hour, so the serenity of the city resonated well with my friend Eno and I, as we strolled aimlessly past assorted eateries and shops. As we wandered, we passed a young male walking in the opposite direction, who suddenly began screaming and shrieking, seemingly at me. This strange, but ordinary reaction sparked a rhetorical question from my boy Eno. “I guess its something you get used to huh?” I thought pensively for a few minutes and replied, “Getting a lot of attention means nothing if it’s not received from who you’re seeking it.” Most people believe women love attention. And to an extent, this is accurate. On any given day, an (attractive) woman gets stared at, glared at, lusted over, holla’ed at, tweeted, poked, messaged, texted, about fifteen times a day. (Number based on my own personal experience) And when women get dressed in their favorite pair of heels, their most flattering dress, and style their hair to perfection, there is absolutely no feeling more affirming than to walk down a crowded street and be complimented by a complete stranger. If you’re a young woman, you walk away smiling to yourself and if you’re an older woman, you walk away smirking, thinking “I STILL got it!” Similar to being surprised with roses at work, unexpectedly (and genuinely) being complimented can truly brighten your day. Attention from the opposite sex can make one feel good and also give an ego boost.  But sometimes when the attention becomes too much, or it is someone you are least interested in, it becomes unbearable, annoying or even embarrassing. There are few instances more frustrating than being pursued by a person you barely even notice. After awhile, it’s frustrating, you stop smiling politely and start muttering “Why can’t I just be left alone?! All I want to do is walk down the street in peace! Is that so much to ask?! “One day, after a similar circumstance happened to me, I wondered if I would be so annoyed if the attention I was receiving was welcome. Would I have the same mind-set if I received these accolades by a person I actually had an interest in? And after thinking about it, the answer is no. It would mean the world to me if that one person I was attracted to would call text or compliment me all day long. But when the attention comes from someone whom you have absolutely no interest in, it falls on deaf ears. You’re too busy thinking about the one you’d rather be hearing it from to truly care. I think I can speak for most women when I say, we definitely want the love and attention from men, just not all men. We want attention from men we love and find our attractive, however the number of admirers women have tend NOT to fall in the category.


1 comment:

Mz. Diggy Dulche said...

My favorite part of the post: "You’re too busy thinking about the one you’d rather be hearing it from to truly care."

That statement reminded me of all the times random people in my life showed me love. People who complimented me daily, gave me the attention I claimed I craved for ... but I didn't even give them a chance ... because it wasn't who *I thought* I wanted.

This post makes me reflect on the fact that sometimes we have to let go in order to truly receive. Shout out to Khaya for an insightful blog ... perfect timing!