Thursday, September 6, 2012

Sup Bitch!?

Yeeeeeeaaah Nigga! I'm back! Lmao.

No but seriously...

That intro made me feel like a comedian, "Women be shopiiiin!" lol.
Please everyone, be seated. We're gonna have fun with words on this one.

I try to always give a little disclaimer with these topics so I'll say now, if you are easily offended, please move your curser to the upper right hand corner of your screen (left if you're using a mac) and click the big red "X" (red bubble if you're using a mac) lol.

So bitches... what's up? Lol
I was thinkin about this topic while at a rest stop on the way back from the Jersey Shore while talkin to D. I remember a time when we used to put females on a very high pedestal and would never use the word "bitch." Then we turned 16. Lol Aight maybe a little older than that. I realized that using the word is something that came from my experiences with women in that transitional period between young man and adult.
I remember a time when I would think and say "That girl" and when dudes said "bitch" I'd be like: "Chill" lol. Back then I think I might have only used it when really mad at a girl or while rappin along to Hip-Hop lyrics. Fast forward to now, it is a part of my everyday vocabulary. Why you ask? Why the eff not bitch? Lol... Nah, lemme slow it down.

Remember when you were a kid and your parents or other adults used to curse around you, but would turn the heat up under ya ass if you cursed? What would they say to you about cursing? "I'm grown, I can use those words, you can't." I never understood that and to a slight extent still don't. But then I became grown. We get older and we begin to see life differently, things aren't as innocent as they once were and guess what, some of us start using profanity. Lol. Think back to when you first started cursin. I can remember when it was. I was 9, in 4th grade. C.S. 92 public school was the setting. Somewhere between havin project kids as classmates, watchin black comedians and watchin a whole lot of South Park (if it was even out that year) I sorta picked up and adapted to my environment. However, I'm not tryin to point fingers and blame anyone for my behavior or actions, I'm just givin you the facts.
But I know I'm not the only one. Think about the first time you fell and scrapped your knee while roller blading, or got hurt doing something stupid as a kid, I'm sure you held on to the aching body part and said "Ahhhh, Shit!" or something to that effect right? Lol. Or think about a time you woke up and hit your toe on the corner of the bed frame. Uh-huh, I bet you cursin right now just thinkin about it. Lol. I say all that to say that cursin has just become a part of our everyday vocabulary, for a lot of us at least. So "bitch" is no different. Especially once you actually start dealin with women.

See on the path to finding the right woman a man will date many many many females, as a woman would date many many males in her path to meeting Mr. Right. It's the natural order of things. Naturally during this time we meet some bad apples, which are all very necessary in helping us weed out the qualities and traits we want in a mate or life partner or whatever the hell it is you're lookin for. So in dealin with these females we tend to come across bitches. Now here's where we have fun with words. Have you ever heard the song "Bitches and Sisters" by my favorite rapper Jay-Z off his album 'The Blueprint 2'? Lol, well if you haven't I would suggest you open up YouTube and give it a listen so that it will serve as an audio aid in this discussion. In the mean time allow me to give you an excerpt:

"Sisters get respect, bitches get what they deserve
SIsters work hard, bitches work your nerves
Sisters hold you down, bitches hold you up
Sisters help you progress, bitches will slow you up
Sisters cook up a meal, play their role with the kids
Bitches in street with their nose in your biz
Sisters tell the truth, bitches tell lies
Sisters drive cars, bitches wanna ride
Sisters give-up the ass, bitches give-up the ass
Sisters do it slow, bitches do it fast
Sisters do their dirt outside of where they live
Bitches have niggas all up in your crib
Sisters tell you quick "you better check your homie"
Bitches don't give a fuck, they wanna check for your homie
Sisters love Jay cuz they know how 'Hov is
I love my sisters, I don't love no bitch"
                                                                            - Jay-Z

You tell em Hov! Lol. 
So you see we deal with Sisters:
These are the girls we like, regardless of whether or not we stay with them for the long run. The ones who we use as a prototype or standard to what our lady should be. Easy to talk to, little to no arguments, funny, caring, sex is great, and whatever else. She may be or might have been your girlfriend for a while but the break up would be mutual or for reasons that aren't as toxic as they would be with Bitches. Which you might call her at the break up point, like you might have while you were fightin with her and were talkin to your boys about it, but you never really saw her in that light. Over all, she was cool and in retrospect she was/is a sister.

Then there's the Bitches:
Usually the bitches are the ones with amazing puddah (vagina, for the slang impaired) but they're crazy, selfish, manipulative, extremely moody, retarded, basically all the harsh words you can think of that mean she aint worth bein around for longer than it takes you to nut, get ya clothes back on and hittin the road! I know it sounds crazy, but this is the crazy world we're livin. The thing with bitches is, we don't really know they're bitches until it's too late in the game. I mean by now she probably already threatened to kill you a few times, has probably pulled a knife out on that ass, keyed your car, taken your credit card and all the cash out your wallet, spent that shit, called your actual girlfriend and told her all about ya affairs!
Don't look at the screen like that, as if I'm the only one this has happened to! Lmao. After all that, you're not gonna call her a queen, or a beautiful young lady or nuttin else, you know what you gonna call her, what are you gonna call her? Let's all say it together a BITCH! Lol.

So now you see where the usage of the word bitch comes from right? I know a lot of you feminist out there are thinkin: "No! This is rude and disrespectful to women." Oh yeah ho? So you mean to tell me you've never used the word? You don't talk to people about your best friends and say "That's my bitch!" You don't get into confrontations with other women at the club or at the super market or in church and say "Fuck You Bitch!" Yeah you know you do. It's no different than the word "Nigga." I can't openly use it with my boys around white people and then be uncomfortable with them using it with theirs. Same way you can't be all open about it with ya homies and be mad when I say it. Feel me?

I know the rest of you feminist are sayin "Well a Bitch is a dog." Well ladies lemme tell you, I have dogs, both female, and I'll tell you, I don't see a huge difference in behavior, but I won't dive into that one right now! LMFAO.

Have I offended you? It's just words bitch, pull your skirt down.

Just to further help you out I've come up with a list of Sisters and Bitches so that you can further easily identify when it is acceptable to use the word:

Sisters:
Claire Huxtable, Michelle Obama, Oprah, My Mom, Your Mom, All the women in your family, all the women in my family, Hermione from Harry Potter, Jada Pinkett-Smith, Hilary Clinton, Mary-Jane Watson from Spiderman and Maya Angelou.
Just to name a few.

Bitches:
Ursela from the Little Mermaid, Rihanna (I'll still do you girl!), The main bitch from the Twilight movies, Kim Kardashian, Mystique from X-Men, Jenny from Forrest Gump (til she got her act together), That bitch that lives on the 5th floor of your buildin, and Rose's mom in Titanic.
Again, just to name a few.

Lol. So what have we learned in all this? Profanity is not a big deal. And "bitch" is a word we use now that we're grown. If you've been hurt by anyone who ever used the word towards you or around you, remember we are only responsible for what we say, not what others feel.

Hope I covered all bases and explained this topic well enough for you.

Peace Bitches

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

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